Some people come into our lives, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never the same.
From a Genesis VBAC mom
Genesis mom of a beautiful baby boy, 19 January 2019, at 13:55 and weighing 3,92kg.
I am blessed with two beautiful and perfect children. My daughter was born in 2014 via caesarean section. I love her very much and I am eternally grateful that we were both healthy and safe, but I was disappointed with the circumstances in which she was born. My pregnancy was challenging enough as I suffered until the end with hyperemesis gravidarum.
Unfortunately I also had a traumatic hospital experience and spent many nights questioning and crying over the terrible memories that clung to me. When my daughter was 3 years old I began doing extensive research and decided that I would not allow myself to go through the same experience.
My sister went to Genesis Maternity Clinic and had an amazing journey with her midwife, Ruwaida Moola and Doula Sadiyah Sayed. After hearing her story I began I formulating my VBAC birth plan even though I wasn’t even ready to conceive yet . I started praying, eating healthy, exercising and taking vitamins in order to prepare my body for pregnancy. I wanted to be spiritually , mentally and physically prepared for this pregnancy and birth. God willing I fell pregnant in April 2018!
When I met Sister Ruwaida Moola for the first time I knew I was doing the right thing. She is such a wonderful midwife and I immediately felt at ease and confident. My pregnancy was not so easy but it was definitely more enjoyable than my first pregnancy. I believe that having a wonderful Midwife and Doula contributed to that.
Fast forward to 17th of January 2019, I had a membrane sweep done. That night I had contractions and didn’t sleep all night . When I called Ruwaida she wisely advised me to try and get some rest and wait it out as it was very early labour . The whole of the 18th of January I was in communication with Ruwaida and Sadiyah who supported me throughout. My husband and I decided to go in on the eve of the 18th as we were confused as to whether this was real labour. The moment I reached Genesis Clinic and saw Ruwaida I felt better already. She gave me words of encouragement and told me to rest.
At 04:00am in the morning the pains were bothering me. I called my Doula Sadiyah who was there in no time with all her comforting oils, bean bags and her magical hands. She knew exactly where to rub me and how to distract me. She managed to keep me calm and focused. I can’t imagine why a woman would want to labour without a Doula.
Ruwaida came in like a breath of fresh air at 6am and assured me that things are moving along perfectly and that I was doing very well . Meanwhile Sadiyah was constantly there for me and we went for a walk outside since my baby had not yet engaged . She made sure that I was staying hydrated and comfortable at all times. After a while I felt sleepy and Sadiyah took me back to my room and helped me get comfortable. While my husband and I rested she quietly helped me through every contraction and I managed to sleep for an hour . When I woke up she suggested I get into the bath . Oh, the relief I felt as soon as I stepped into the tub! I felt so loved having my dear husband at my side feeding me cereal as I hadn’t eaten the whole of Friday, my Doula there to wipe my face with a cool wash cloth and my midwife breathing with me and comforting me.
My mum arrived and was praying constantly and even though the pain was terrible I knew I could get though it with Gods help and my supportive birth team. After Ruwaida broke my waters at 7cm, time was a blur for me and I remember trying my best to breathe and pray through every contraction. I remember Ruwaida telling me that that is one contraction less that is bringing you closer to meeting your baby. I recall Sadiyah reminding me that I was doing so well.
The last hour was challenging and I recall doubting in my mind whether I could do it. Ruwaida could see that I was despondent and she asked me to feel my babies head. That and hearing my babies heartbeat gave me all the drive I needed to keep going. The cord was around my babies neck twice so at the end I went onto the bed for the pushing. That was by far the most satisfying thing I ever did in my life. I pushed with all my might and at 13:55 my beautiful baby boy came into this world weighing in at a whooping 3.92kgs and 53cms long.
I couldn’t believe that I finally achieved my natural VBAC! Immediately after birth my husband was talking about the next baby because of how confident we felt with Ruwaida and Sadiyah . It was one of the best moments in my life and I think about it everyday. I had the most amazing birth team possible. Ruwaida and Sadiyah worked tirelessly and selflessly to provide what I needed and when I needed it.
My VBAC was the hardest thing I ever did but it was worth it and perfect in every way. I was on a birth high for days and I still think fondly about my experience. I thank God for granting me my supportive husband, family, perfect children and the worlds best birth team.
“Some people come into our lives, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never the same.”
To my Dear Midwife Ruwaida and Doula Sadiyah:
Not too many people deliver the promises they make, let alone look after and do whatever it does take.
Very few can say that they delivered at all, forget being there at my beck and call.
At all hours you were there with kindness and grace, with compassion and love etched on your face.
Support, encouragement, dedication and more, you embodied the art of caring ~ of that I am sure. To be
a midwife/doula requires intelligence and skill, but to be someone like you takes a lot more to fulfil.
Whatever was needed you did with a reassuring smile, you are a special midwife/doula ~ always going the extra mile. If only every pregnant woman was wise enough and knew, That it is the best decision to have a midwife/doula like you. I want to say thank you for all that you have done, To help me deliver my precious little one.
I truly appreciate all your help and your care, the world is a better place knowing you are there.
Tirelessly you work through the night and day, the world’s best midwife/doula is you ~ I can honestly say. So again thank you very much for always being there, Passionate professionals like you are honestly rare.
Wishing you all the best with my sincerest prayers too.
I hope that you know we couldn’t have done it without both of you!
A letter to my Midwife Sister Ruwaida Moola:
As my son nears his first year I feel compelled to let you know my thoughts.
I don’t know if you have ever received letters like this but as I enjoy my son I think about you fondly everyday . I can’t get the memories of our baby boy’s amazing birth experience out of my head. I know I could not have ever written something like this after my daughter was born via c-section. I once tried typing out the experience I had with her but it ended with tears before I even completed the first line. That was when I realized how badly it affected me.
I don’t know if all midwives share your amazing qualities but seriously Ruwaida you are the best of the best. I need to let you know how thankful I am on so many levels. I am thankful as a mother, as a woman, as your client and as a human being. It’s one of those times when just saying “thank you” isn’t enough.
Thank you for showing me kindness, compassion and love throughout my pregnancy, labour, birth and after birth. Speaking to you always made me feel at ease. You made me feel so special and that my concerns were not foolish. I never felt like another patient with complaints. I looked forward to our consults because I always left feeling better. Your bubbly nature and positive mind set enabled me to feel confident and strong.
Truth be told, I am not a graceful pregnant lady but I miss being pregnant because I enjoyed the time spent with you. You never rushed a single consult and there was never a question left unanswered. After every visit with you, my husband and I would leave full of joy and chat about how lucky we are that our prayers were accepted for you to become our midwife.
Thank you for always being truthful and presenting me my options exactly as they were. By being honest you never set me up for any disappointments. I needed the pep talk the night I was in labour. I needed to be reassured that my pain was real and that it was going to get a million times worse but would be worth it in the end. You were absolutely correct, it was definitely worth it.
Thank you for always asking me if I was ready when you needed to check me internally. I know that it is a necessary procedure but requesting my consent always made me feel relaxed, in control and showed me that you respected me. I never felt uncomfortable with you. The way you so gracefully cover and comfort during awkward proceedures makes them so much more manageable and pleasant.
Thank you for honouring each and every request in my birth plan even the ones you knew I wouldn’t stick to in the end. I love how you read it aloud to remind everyone in the room about my wishes. Alhamdulillah, with you my birth went even better then I planned .
Thank you for taking the time to talk to my daughter when we came in for consults and including her always. Thank you for asking my mum if she was okay when she teared seeing me in pain during my labour. You reassured my husband who can’t stand to see me in pain and that allowed him to be calm for me. I appreciate that besides being an amazing midwife you are definitely one of the most compassionate people I have ever met.
Thank you for being in background during my entire birth and stepping in calmly at every single moment that you were needed . Distracting me with cute comments about my birthing outfit and making me laugh through my pain. I actually recall saying I wish I could chill with you more often (haha). While I was gasping with the pain through my worst contractions, you were like a breath of fresh air.
Thank you for believing in me and looking at me deep in my eyes breathing with me and saying, you ARE doing in. Your sincere belief in me made me believe in myself. You knew exactly what I needed and when I needed it. In my mind I was giving up when you suddenly put the doppler on my tummy . Hearing my babies heart beating was all I needed to keep going.
Thank you for making every situation more beautiful. The breaking of my waters just became more humourous after you referred to it as “lovely and clear.” When you told me that “each contraction will bring you closer to meeting your baby” I dealt with them better. After this I stopped tensing my body and began embracing the contractions instead of wishing them away.
Thank your for the wonderful aftercare, for the time you took to look at my baby and comment on how beautiful he is. You spent more than 5 minutes just cuddling and speaking to him. You took off his clothes to weight him and instead of just leaving him for me to dress, you redressed him. When he cried you took the trouble of rocking and calming him down before giving him back to me.
Thank you for the time you took to talk to me about anything that was on my mind. Thank you for phoning me when I told you about the traumatic incident that we went through instead of just chatting on whatsapp. Thank you for always replying to my messages and answering my calls.
I was trapped in disappointment with my previous birth experience that dishonoured and disrespected me. After my sons birth I found a strength in me that I did not know existed. After this magnificent experience I managed to let go of all the negativity and left Genesis Maternity Clinic at peace and feeling loved, empowered and strong.
I wish I had the words to describe the impact that your encouraging words and caring touch had on me during labour. I honestly wish I could send all expecting women to you so that they can experience birth the way it ought to be experienced. I look forward to my next birth with you inshallah.
On your challenging days please remember that you are not a one in million kind of midwife , you are a once in a lifetime kind of midwife AND person.